Numerous husbands and wives who have been victimized by infidelity have a great deal of emotions and issues to work through. From the rage which at certain points threatens to the disappointment of what your spouse did to facing up to the bitter reality that the relationship will never be the same ever again. This is an ugly concept but unfortunately it is one which will likely stalk you for a long time.
Deciding to stay married to this person isn't going to be an easy task. However there's something else that will have to be dealt with which is the sense of helplessness that consumes quite a few mates that have been cheated on.
For one their self worth is knocked for a loop. You start to question yourself about anything and everything. Exactly what did you do that caused your significant other to stray, what does the other person have that you don't have, are you going to lose your spouse for good along with other disturbing questions.
But it doesn't stop there. Pretty soon those helpless thoughts and emotions find their way into all areas of you life. The next thing you know decisions that previously you would not have given a second thought too become major sticking points. That's the power of an extramarital relationship.
But it doesn't need to be that way. To come through an extramarital affair and also emerge from it with your personal dignity and decision making abilities completely intact just remember a few points:
1. Their Behavior Their Responsibilities
Do not allow your mate's misconduct to subvert your attitude as well as feelings about yourself. They committed adultery as a result of a flaw that is inside of them not you. It's just like a person addicted to alcohol stating the reason they drink is because of something their mate is or is not doing. Rather than wanting to communicate the alcoholic escapes to their own little world and makes sure to lock the door behind them. When they emerge and face the rest of the world they are only too eager to blame everyone but themselves. This applies to a two timing spouse as well. Their cheating should not be your fault.
You do not have to go it alone when figuring out ways to get over unfaithfulness. There are numerous options on hand. Support therapy groups consisting of people that have or perhaps are going through precisely what you are. Seek them out. This could also be a great time to pull your family and friends a whole lot closer to you as a way to make it through.
3. Assure Yourself
Be careful not to just sit by as the negative thoughts (and there will be many) inundate you. Fight back with positive statements and affirmations. Keep it uncomplicated yet be consistent. Also bear in mind staying busy can go a long way in assisting you to getting and staying strong. Have comfort in that you are an awful lot stronger than you realize and by all means start giving you that credit you rightfully deserve.